


Only one way in and no way out

by ohmypreciousgirl



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: F/M, Romance Novel Heroine Oliver Queen, based on s02 spoilers, post s02e01
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-16
Updated: 2013-11-16
Packaged: 2018-01-01 17:02:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1046312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohmypreciousgirl/pseuds/ohmypreciousgirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Felicity knew it was futile harboring any romantic feelings for Oliver, but sometimes she wondered what would be like if he actually saw her as an attractive woman and not just the genius good friend who helped him save the city.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Only one way in and no way out

**Author's Note:**

> Title from ‘No Way Out’ by Rie Sinclair (let’s raise our hands to the sky and be thankful the title is not from a Taylor Swift song, although the series title is. I tried and that’s what matters). The fic started with a request by arganne and ended up in a fic series. I’ve no idea how it happened. Special thanks to Elsa (dedication2em), Katie (everythingisbloomable), Tanya (tanya-posts) and Mariah (mchriste22).

Since Oliver had appeared in her life, Felicity had been to many parties, galas and balls, but she didn’t think she would ever get used to it. Once upon a time, the most glamorous event she’d ever attended had been her aunt’s wedding to a millionaire – a marriage that had only lasted three years. Now, such events have become kind of routine – thanks to her life as Oliver Queen’s Girl Wednesday by day and the genius behind the hero of Starling City by night.

This particular Saturday night, she was at a ball organized by Oliver’s company to generate funds for the reconstruction of Glades – just one of many attempts the Queen Family were trying to make up for the damage they’d done to that portion of the city. To be honest, she wasn’t even sure why Oliver had insisted that she attend. She’d spent most of the night making small talk with a few executives that had approached her to talk about Oliver or, when she was alone, she’d watched couples dancing.

Specifically, Oliver slow dancing with Laurel.

 _Perfect couple_ , she thought with a slight trace of bitterness. She knew she had no right to feel jealous, but she couldn’t help herself. She knew that it was futile to harbor any feelings for Oliver, but sometimes she wondered what it would be like if Laurel wasn’t the one and only for him and he actually saw _her,_ Felicity, as an attractive woman. Frowning, she shook her head in distaste of her own thoughts. They were good friends, and that is how it would stay.  She would continue to help him save the city and work by his side during the day.   

Oliver let Laurel go with a sincere smile as the song finished. He looked around, searching for something, and when his eyes met hers, his smile widened. She couldn’t help but mirror his expression as he started closing the distance between them.

“Having fun?” he asked, standing right in front of her.

She shrugged. “The wine is great, so you can say I’m having fun.”

He laughed, shaking his head. “I knew you would appreciate my efforts.”

She raised her brows in surprise. “I didn’t know you had such strong feelings about wine.”

“I don’t,” he agreed, giving her his charming smile. “But I know someone who loves a good wine and I thought she would appreciate it.”

She frowned in disbelief. “Wait, are you really telling me you made a special effort with the wine because of me?”

“Yes. No. Maybe,” he teased her. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”

She shot him an unimpressed look as he continued to smirk. He knew that she hated it when he taunted her like that, but she felt touched anyway. It meant a lot that he even remembered that she was so passionate about wine. Although, she believed he was joking about choosing the wine carefully because she loved it.

 _He is such a good friend_ , she reminded herself. _No need to wonder about anything else but the great friendship you two have._

“So, what did you do the whole night?”

“This and that,” she shrugged. “I mostly watched people talking and dancing,” she paused and before she could think better of it added: “Is there a reunion of Mr. Queen and his one and only in the works?”

He gave her a confused look, before saying “What are you talking about?”

“You and Laurel.  The Laurel. Dancing very cozily in the ballroom. Ringing any bells?” she raised a brow, schooling her expressions to show no emotion.

“There’s no me and Laurel. There’s me and there’s Laurel – two separate entities - and there was a dance between two friends, that’s it,” he stated in a very determined voice.  She gave him kudos for looking like he meant it.

“Huh, sure,” she said skeptically. Suddenly, he took another step and was very close to her, invading her personal space.

_What is personal space anyway?_

“Laurel is not the ‘one and only’ for me,” he said, imitating her voice. “I loved her very much once, but I don’t feel like that anymore,” he narrowed his eyes, his voice dropping a few decibels. “Laurel is my friend and that’s the only way she fits in my life. And, honestly, it’s the only way I want her to.”

Felicity swallowed – feeling her mouth suddenly dry. She felt like she was missing something important in that moment, but she didn’t know exactly what. She chose to just nod along.

“It sounds like you’ve got some things figured out.”

He smiled gently, shrugging at her. “I’m a work in progress.”

She tipped her head and studied him for a moment. He looked and sounded sincere the whole time. He rarely talked about his feelings, but he was being honest with her at that moment. It was nice to see exactly what was going on inside his head for once and not just wonder where he actually stood.

_One step at time._

“May I have this dance?”

Oliver’s voice snapped Felicity back to reality. He stood in front of her with one hand held out to her. She smiled at him before sliding her hand into his.

“Yes, you may.”

Their eyes locked for a moment before he walked her toward the dance floor. Her breath hitched as he turned her around and his hand came to rest at her waist, his fingers curling into the material of her pink dress. Felicity laid one hand on his shoulder, taking his free hand in her other and twining their fingers together in a tight grip.

Once again their eyes locked, and then they started moving.

She couldn’t take her eyes off of Oliver and it seemed like he was having the same issue. In that moment, it felt like it was just the two of them and the soft music playing in the background.

Suddenly, Oliver pulled her closer and she was completely lost in his gaze, in the way he was looking at her. She couldn’t find the words to describe his expression, but if she’d dared, she might have said he was staring her in adoration.

 _I’m not the type of women Oliver shows interest in,_ she reminded herself, brushing off the foolish fantasy immediately.

Then he moved closer and every thought beyond _Oliver_ faded from Felicity’s mind. She let him lead her across the room; his arm pressed her closer to his body as they moved. She glanced at him and he was smiling genuinely at her, his eyes shining with joy. She felt her face flush and her stomach clench, in a pleasant way. She smiled back before she leaned into him, their temples almost touching. She felt him exhale as he whispered in her ear. “You are beautiful.”

She looked at him in astonishment. “Thanks,” she muttered. Giving her another of his smug smiles, he swept them up into the music again and they didn’t say anything at all.

They just danced and it was perfect.

 _Maybe_ , she considered. _Maybe things were shifting._

(She was right. That’s how they started, but she didn’t know it yet)

 

* * *

 

 “Oh my God,” she nearly groaned. “My taste buds are having a party here.”

Oliver laughed at her, his attention diverted momentarily from the street. They were driving back to Queen Consolidated after a long and exhausting meeting. They did not even have enough time to stop for lunch.

“Seriously, I can’t believe you were holding out on me with these brownies. They’re divine.”

 “I’ll get you more next time Raisa makes them,” he promised.

She nodded, finishing her last piece of brownie.

“Thank God you had these in here because I was crazy hungry,” she confessed. “If you weren’t driving, I’d have so kissed you right now.”

She closed her eyes briefly, her cheeks reddening. “I mean not _kiss_ kiss you,” she stuttered glancing at him. He smirked at her with a glint of challenge in his eyes before abruptly swerving over to the side of the street and stopping the car.

“Not driving anymore,” he declared, their eyes meeting as he looked at her with a mix of anticipation and defiance.

Her eyes widened, her lips forming into an O of shock. When she made no further move, Oliver raised a brow and leaned in. She licked her lips expectantly as he drew close enough for her to feel his breath against her skin. He closed his eyes and to mirror his action, she began to do the same when the magic was broken by the sound of Oliver’s phone ringing.

“Shit,” he groaned in clear frustration before pulling away. Reaching for his phone, he apologized. “Sorry.”

Felicity sat there in a state of disbelief over what they’d almost done. She watched Oliver’s face shift from utter annoyance to concern in a matter of seconds, the way his entire body tensed up snapping her out of her shock.

“Meet me in the lair,” he ordered before hanging up.

“What happened?” she asked in concern.

“Thea disappeared,” he announced, turning on the car before making a u-turn and heading back the way they’d come.

 

* * *

 

The next few days were completely chaos. Felicity worked with Oliver, Diggle and Officer Lance to find Thea. She was glad for the extra help because she didn’t know how much she could handle everything. The thing was, that she wasn’t just looking for information about his sister; she was also keeping an eye on Oliver so he wouldn’t slip to his old ways. She knew Diggle was paying attention too, but she worried so much about Oliver’s mental state that she took this job personally; even when she knew that Diggle also had Oliver’s back.

On the fifth night in the lair, it was just the two of them. Felicity was waiting for the research about Thea’s location when she was startled by the sound of glass shattering. Turning around quickly, she turned towards Oliver who seemed to be in the middle of an outburst or breakdown.  He looked closed off and furious, his whole posture intimidating and threatening, but she didn’t let it get to her. Rising, she crossed the distance separating them. When their bodies were almost brushing against each other, he glared at her for a few moments before his attention slipped away again.

“Hey,” she called him back; her hand touched his chin to force him to look into her eyes. “Oliver, focus on me,” she ordered gently. He was scowling, his mouth in a thin red line below the rage reflecting in his blue eyes.

“We are going to get Thea back, Oliver,” she vowed, holding his face in her hands. “Trust me, please.”

Slowly, his face softened under her caress. His hands settled at her waist, his forehead lowering to rest against hers, both of them breathing the same air. The act radiated a kind of intimacy she never thought that she would share with Oliver, not with the closed off way he used to behave around her. But in that moment, she felt a shift that took place between them and she had no idea where it would lead them. The memory of Oliver leaning into her for a kiss five days ago invaded her mind.

She took a deep breath and stepped away from his touch. She needed a break from his intensity in order to focus on her task. She couldn’t let her feelings for him consume her mind and interfere with her work. Finding Thea was her only goal and she was the best at her job.

Oliver’s gaze wasn’t as lost as it had been a few minutes ago; the anger wasn’t in control of his senses anymore. He’d regained his control and that loosened the tightness inside Felicity’s stomach. She brought her hands to his face, lowering his head until she could kiss his temples. Her lips lingering on his forehead before she released him of her grasp.

“It’ll be okay, Oliver,” she promised, walking back to her desk.

She felt his eyes on her the whole time she was working.

 

* * *

 

The first night Felicity was able to rest was the day following Thea’s rescue. The young woman was physically alright but mentally traumatized by the turn of events. Oliver was a little worse for the wear, but he was holding up. The fact there were no bodies to bury and the people involved in Thea’s disappearance were all arrested also helped. Aside from making Felicity feel relieved, she knew it meant one less thing for Oliver to feel guilty about, a reminder he wasn’t the mindless murderer Tommy had accused him of being.

She stayed with Oliver while Thea was getting checked out at the hospital, sitting next to him, she took one of his hands in hers, like she knew he needed. Holding his hand, her fingers folded around his in a reassurance while they waited for the result of his sister’s exams. He held on tight, like she was his anchor to reality. Remembering how she had been the one who had gotten through to him in the middle of his breakdown and how she’d made him relax enough to get ahold of his emotions, she believed she wasn’t far from truth.

After the doctor told them that Thea would have to stay in observation, but everything was okay, Oliver held her hands between his and told her to go home.

 “You need to rest,” he said gently. “All of us, actually. Diggle will take you home. You need some sleep and a day off.” She opened her mouth to protest, but he put a finger to her lips to silence her. “No complaints. I’m your boss and you do what I tell you to, ok?” She gave him an unimpressed look because he only pulled the boss card when he thought that she’d be particularly stubborn. “We will see each other Saturday,” he informed her, his eyes holding promises Felicity’s mind couldn’t even begin to process.

“Call me if you need anything,” she said.

“Of course,” he promised. She nodded and gave him a peck on his cheek before she slipped away.

And then, a few hours later she was lying in her bed thinking of Oliver.

Oliver and the way he was surprising her by letting her in. The guy who held everything so close to his heart, was now basically offering himself to her through touches and meaningful looks. She realized they didn’t need words to convey the message they wanted each other to hear. They only needed closeness and intimacy to have an understanding. Only now did she realize how deeply they were connected. Which brought her to the current problem: the almost kiss in his car.

Obviously the incident had been forgotten for the time being and that was okay. There were so much more urgent things to deal with than a kiss that hadn’t even happened. But it made her question if they would ever talk about it. Logically, they should, but would that be the correct course of action? She wondered if acknowledging whatever that was going on between them instead of ignoring it could lead to unnecessary complications, especially because she wasn’t sure if Oliver really wanted her. Maybe he just didn’t want to be alone anymore and she was the best option as she was the only woman who knew his secret life.

She shook her head, trying to find clarity in her confusion. He’d told her that they would see each other on Saturday and gave her the look, but that did not guarantee anything. He could easily brush it off and knowing his last unsuccessful attempts at dating, she truly believed he would let it quiet down for the sake of their friendship. At the moment, she imagined that he’d already decided that it wasn’t worth the risk. They had a good thing going on without any added complications. They would remain friends and that’d be okay.

“Yes, only friends,” she nodded, trying to ignore the sinking feeling in her stomach. _Nothing happened. Nothing changed. Oliver will pretend nothing almost happened because it’d only complicate things between us and we wouldn’t want that._

* * *

 

“Bye, Felicity,” Diggle waved at her as he walked out of the room.

“See you tomorrow,” she said, waving back without taking her eyes off of the paper she was focusing on. Tonight would be the first she and Oliver would spend together without Diggle as buffer.

Anxiety spiked, overwhelming her senses when the door closed behind Diggle. She knew nothing would happen, but her body seemed to be on alert anyway. She started tapping her foot on the floor while she reread the same paragraph for the third time.

Apparently, Diggle had taken her attention span with him out of the door.

She was so focused on trying to concentrate on her document that she yelped when Oliver tore it away from her and threw it on the floor.

“Oliver, what is…” he grabbed her face and his lips were on to hers, his body pushed against hers until they reached the wall.

 _He definitely wants me_ , she reflected as she felt the urgency in his touch and the way his mouth moved against hers. _No one can pretend something like this._

Felicity was so lost in the kiss that she only noticed things were truly heating up when Oliver shoved her skirt up so he could wrap her legs around his waist. She groaned as he pressed up against her, but she didn’t let him go. She just kept kissing him, her hands trailing down his naked back just like she imagined so many times.

_God bless you for not wearing a shirt when you train, Oliver._

She felt them move and the next moment Oliver was setting her down on the desk. Oliver kissed her hard, his hand buried in her hair while the other was up her skirt enough for his fingertips brush the side of her underwear. For a second, Felicity was so glad that she decided to wear her lacey boyshorts instead of her usual cotton bikini underwear. She thrust against his erection, making him let her mouth go and whisper her name against her lips.

“I need to…” he began, but she cut him off.

 “Yeah,” she nodded. _Anything._

She thought about opening his pants, letting them fall down far enough to take out his cock and guide it inside of her. Instead, Oliver took off her underwear and fell to his knees in front of her. He licked his lips like she was something delicious he could finally devour as he pressed a kiss to the inside of her right thigh. His beard scraped her sensitive skin as he put her legs over his shoulders before she felt his tongue touching her clit for the first time.

“Holy fuck,” she moaned as he lapped at her clit, sucking on it before moving down to push his tongue inside her. She cried out, digging her heels into his back and pushing herself into his mouth. She braced herself, holding the edge of the desk with both her hands, her eyes closed in pleasure. She was so lost in the sensation of Oliver’s mouth that when she came it surprised her. Her whole body trembled uncontrollably, her toes curled in pure pleasure and she would probably have fallen from the desk if Oliver hadn’t used his quick reflexes and caught her by the waist. 

She still had her eyes closed when he kissed her again. She could taste herself on his lips and, somehow, that made her want him more. Her hands were on his ass when they heard the sound of someone entering the lair, making them break apart.

“Oh my God,” she jumped off of the desk, her legs feeling like rubber as she tried to straighten her clothes.

Oliver chuckled and pecked her lips, holding her by the waist to stabilize her. “Relax, you look really good,” he said in a husky tone.

Somehow Felicity doubted Oliver was thinking with his brain, so she decided to ignore his compliment and put a safe distance between them, even if she was still a little shaken by their passionate encounter.

Diggle came down and stopped in his tracks, he first looked at the floor and then back to Oliver and Felicity with a judgmental look.

Felicity felt her face burn when she saw what exactly her friend was eyeing. She moved to pick up her underwear, but Oliver was faster and grabbed it.

 “Do we have to talk about boundaries or…?” Diggle trailed off, looking between them.

“No,” the two of them answered at the same time.

Diggle nodded. “I just got a call from one of my old friends asking for help, so why don’t you two make yourselves presentable and then we talk?” he paused, before sighing out loud. “I didn’t see anything, okay?”

Felicity nodded as Diggle walked past them. She reached for her underwear, but Oliver tucked them into his pocket and stared her with a gleam in his eyes. She looked at him in shock before she mouthed “what the hell are you doing?”

Oliver just gave her a smug smile and licked his bottom lip. _So that’s what playboy Oliver Queen before the island looked like,_ she thought.

“Later,” he mouthed before he crossed the lair probably to go to the bathroom, leaving her without underwear and alone with a very judging Diggle.

_Unbelievable._

 

* * *

 

Since meeting Oliver, Felicity’s life had become a succession of shocking events, but nothing prepared her for becoming his lover. Had she fantasized about him? Of course she had. She was a heterosexual woman with a healthy sex drive; it would have been impossible not to imagine having sex with Oliver. He was without doubt the most beautiful and intriguing man she’d ever met. Her dreams were filled with images of him naked in her bed, slowly driving her crazy with his… _everything_. But had she ever expected him to play the role in reality?

Not chance in hell.

But here she was, inside of a cab, going home with Oliver to have sex. After Diggle left, Oliver had informed her that they would take a cab together instead of driving. She’d rolled her eyes and called him ridiculous. “Humor me,” he’d pleaded with a glint in his eyes. Now, seeing how he was feeling her up in the backseat of the taxi while marking up her neck, she understood why he’d been so insistent.

 _Sneaky bastard_.

“Oliver!” she warned him when he tried to put his hand up her skirt.

“Sorry,” he apologized without sounding sorry at all. He grabbed her arm, pulling her against his chest, his mouth grazing her ear before he whispered:

“You make me crazy, Felicity. Especially because I know you’ve got nothing on under your skirt.”

 “And whose fault is that?” she retorted, her cheeks flushing.

“Mine,” he chuckled with satisfaction, tipping her chin and kissing her lips delicately. She closed her eyes at the tenderness.

All the kisses they shared until that moment were filled with passion instead of tenderness. She wasn’t used to being treated as a woman who inspired intense desire. Before Oliver, she only had sex with two other people in her whole life and none of these guys acted like they were consumed by her. With Oliver, she could sense his fervor and avidity just for the way he looked at her. For the first time in her life, she felt sexy and wanted, not just the awkward IT girl she’d been all her life.

As she kissed him softly, she hoped that she wasn’t making a mistake in letting him in and allowing him to take what he wanted. Well…to allow him to give her what she’d been longing for since he’d found her in the IT Department. She was aware that she was taking a leap of faith that her heart wouldn’t be broken too much in the end.

 _One step at time_ , she reminded herself as she leaned back to smile at him.

 

* * *

 

“Come on, Felicity,” Oliver groaned against her mouth. “Don’t quit on me now.”

 “Oliver, it’s too much,” she said, trying to catch her breath between his kisses and the sensation of his fingers playing with her clit. She was so sensitive after her first orgasm that even the slightest touch made her body jerk in reaction.

“But we barely started,” he complained.

“You’re going to kill me with sex, aren’t you?” she moaned. “That was your plan all along to get rid of me.”

Oliver stopped to look at her, before bursting out in laughter. “You’re ridiculous.”

“Oliver,” she groaned when he started nuzzling her neck.

“Let me take care of you, please?”

Felicity giggled. “You already took care of me twice today.”

“And I’ll take care of you all night if you let me,” he gave her a sultry look before licking her lips.

“Oh, God!” she exclaimed, but her voice was muffled by his mouth. “Fine,” she nodded. Suddenly, he moved away, flipping her over onto her stomach.

“I want you on your knees with your legs apart,” he instructed. “Hold onto the headboard with both hands.”

Felicity wasn’t sure if she would manage to do what Oliver asked because her body felt like jelly after all the attention it had received. Miraculously, she was able to stay hoisted onto her knees with her legs a little spread. Immediately, Oliver was pressed against her back, one of his hands gripping her waist tightly and the other buried in her hair. The realization that she was completely at Oliver’s mercy made her clench hard in pleasure.

“Oh my God,” she moaned when he slid into her from behind, the pillow under her muffling her noises as she elevated her hips and buried her face.

 “Uh-uh,” Oliver pulled her hair firmly, but without hurting her. “Don’t cover your mouth, I want to hear you.”

_Fuck._

He touched her body with a familiarity that made it feel like they’d been having sex for years. He knew the precise spot to hit repeatedly to make her moans turn into cries. She could feel the tension of her orgasm build up as he thrust inside of her. She felt the controlled and paced rhythm he set start to falter when she got close to coming. He moved faster and faster, making her grip the headboard so tight that her knuckles turned white. And then she felt the full body spams hit her strongly, followed by the hot sensation of her release, and her body falling onto the bed. She was so lost in her own orgasm that she only realized Oliver came when he collapsed halfway on top of her.

"That was… wow," she uttered, words failing her for the first time since the car incident. He moved away from her, and then he tugged her against his chest.

"Mm-hm," Oliver agreed. “Amazing,” he added, running his hand up and down her side as they began to relax.

 _Oliver just ruined me for everyone else_ , she thought as she fell asleep.

 

* * *

 

Things rolled along smoothly for the next month considering the lives that they led. Oliver and Felicity set up a working schedule for both Queen Consolidated and Hood business that allowed them enough free time for the not-so-occasional hook up. Oliver spent his weekdays at home to keep an eye on Thea and his mother, who had just gotten out of prison, and on the weekends he’d stay at Felicity’s apartment.

And no, just because they were sleeping together, did _not_ mean that she was Oliver’s girlfriend.

Not that they ever talked about it, but after knowing him for almost two years, she understood how his dating program worked and he never acted like that with her. He never took her out to have dinner in a really expensive restaurant nor created a special date for the two of them. He didn’t touch her more than the usual, which wasn’t really a fair comparison with other people if she thought about it. After he’d returned from the island the second time, Oliver and she had become really close friends and that seemed to mean the concept of personal space and appropriate touching were forgotten.

So, she knew things hadn’t really changed between them – even if they were having sex – and she’d accepted being friends with benefits with silent agreement. She didn’t need to discuss feelings and intentions; to her the lines were pretty delineated: fun between friends that cared deeply for each other and no emotional attachments.

Felicity was a logical woman that could keep sex and emotions separated from each other; her current relationship with Oliver proved that. They were still the same people they’d been as platonic friends; nothing that really mattered had changed.

Just…sometimes he spent the night at her house and gave her amazing orgasms.

She never wondered how it would be if the sexual part were actually happening in the context of a relationship. Hell, she avoided even thinking about a romantic relationship with Oliver, now that she was sure he saw her as an attractive woman. She didn’t want to be that person who overanalyzed every interaction they had and interpreted it as a green light for letting feelings get involved. No, she refused to believe having sex with Oliver would change his feelings for her and turn their silent agreement into a long-term relationship. She didn’t harbor those hopes because she knew it’d only lead to disappointment and a broken heart when it didn’t happen.

No, she knew it wouldn’t result in anything and she wasn’t freaking out or getting upset over it. She’d deal with the aftermath of their friends with benefits status when it actually ran its course.

Not now.

For the first time, Felicity allowed herself to have an adventure without fixating on the scars it’d eventually leave in her heart. She’d enjoy her time with Oliver and fuck the consequences. If she’d learned an essential lesson since she’d met Oliver it was to live your life to the fullest before something terrible happened and you died.

 

* * *

 

“Oliver, I need you to check this out,” she informed him as she entered his office at the nightclub holding a few papers about her newest discovery regarding the League of Assassins. “You won’t believe what I,” she stopped her tracks when she looked up and realized that Oliver wasn’t alone. “Oh my God, I’m so sorry. I should’ve…”

Oliver cuts her off with a chuckle. “It’s okay, Felicity. Come here,” he beckoned her closer. “Felicity, this is Andrew Mitchell, he went to college with me,” he said pointing at the lanky ginger man with green eyes.

 _Seriously, to know Oliver does it required to be very attractive?_ , she thought as she extended her hand at the guy with a smile.

“Andrew, this is Felicity Smoak,” Andrew shook her hand, mouthing a hello to her. “My girlfriend.”

Felicity’s whole body froze in shock. Her eyes widened, his declaration leaving her speechless.

_Girlfriend?_

She so was lost in her confusion that she only noticed that Oliver’s friend was leaving when he waved at her. “Bye, Felicity. Nice to meet you,” she gave him a weak smile.

“You too,” she replied, giving him a week smile as Oliver saw his friend out of his office.

 _There’s a logical reasoning behind Oliver’s lie_ , she decided. _No need get worked up about it. Play it cool. Tease him about it._

When Oliver turned around, Felicity tried to school her expression and not show her obvious conflicted feelings.

“So, I’m not the executive assistant anymore,” she said, hoping it sounded like she was teasing him about his lie. “Since when do you call me your girlfriend?”

Oliver tipped his head before grinning at her and taking a step closer to put his hands on her waist. “Cute,” he said, nuzzling her nose. Felicity’s eyes widened at his move, her confusion intensifying at his weird action. “Just because I don’t call you my girlfriend when you’re around, it doesn’t mean I don’t say it to anyone.”

Felicity felt like someone had pulled the rug out from under her feet. She shook her head trying to organize her mind. _What the hell is going on?_

“You think we’re dating,” she blurted out the realization that didn’t make sense in her mind.

She watched Oliver shift immediately in front of her eyes. The easy-going posture became rigid in less than a few seconds. His defensive posture would have been fascinating if she wasn’t so busy trying to understand that _Oliver_ actually thought she was his girlfriend.

“What you mean by that?” he asked as his hands fell from her waist. “No. The question is: what you think we were doing here?”

She opened her mouth a few times; rubbing her hands together as she tried to find the best way to tell him what she thought their relationship was about.

“Two friends that care deeply for each other, having fun with no emotional attachments?” she winced as she said it out loud.

Oliver looked like Felicity had slapped him across the face.

“Oh, I see,” he uttered, averting his gaze. Something broke inside of her as he laughed bitterly.  “Obviously because it’s with Oliver Queen it is just meaningless sex?” he stepped away from her and she was shocked to see how much her words had hurt him.

“Oliver,” she tried to get closer, her hand reaching for him. He pushed her hand away, taking a step toward the door.

“Felicity, you said enough,” his voice was rough like she never heard before. “I understand perfectly how you feel about me,” he turned his back on her, walked to the door and turned the doorknob. He looked at her again and she could see his disappointment written all over his face.

“If I really wanted a woman to have fun with without any kind of emotional involvement, I’d choose anyone else in this city but you.” he paused, looking at her again with disappointment clearly written on his face. “It’s my fault you thought different and for that I’m sorry.”

He closed the door behind him without a sound.

He might as well have slammed it in her face.

(It felt like an ending, she hoped she was wrong)

 

* * *

 

Of every outcome she’d played in her mind regarding her involvement with Oliver, the one that actually happened hadn’t even occurred to her.

If Oliver was anyone else, she would have gone after him and tried to explain the reasoning behind her words and erase his pain. Unfortunately, he _was_ Oliver and she knew that trying to talk to him immediately after a fight wouldn’t work well. He was upset with her and she was too shocked to form a rational thought to defend herself. He needed time to cool off and she needed to put her thoughts in order.

If she was completely honest with herself, she was hurting just as much as Oliver. She hated to cause other people pain, especially someone as important to her as Oliver. Every time she’d played out the scenario in her mind, _she_ had been the one who ended up hurt about being friends with benefits with Oliver. Felicity had never imagined he would look at her like she’d stabbed him in the back for even thinking about it. She’d known that she had the power to hurt him, but to actually see it? It really had cut deeply. She never wanted to experience something like that ever again. It was awful.

She’d honestly thought that they weren’t serious because they’d never spoken about it, but replaying his last words and the way he’d looked at her, she felt foolish and guilty. And the worst part was that he blamed himself for the way she felt.

_Always feeling responsible for things he can’t control._

She should have known Oliver wouldn’t ever take her so lightly because she was very important to him. Not just as the genius girl who helped him all the time, but because they were close friends. He relied on her for so many things. She was the only person aside Diggle that Oliver would open up to about the Island and she should have realized the meaning behind that. He trusted her and Diggle with everything he could and he wouldn’t risk their relationship just for some fun on the side. Oliver had dated plenty in the two years that they’d known each other, and he could have found a woman willing to have some fun with no string attachments. But he hadn’t wanted that, he’d wanted a meaningful relationship with the woman he trusted the most and it had blown up in his face. 

Not that he wasn’t completely without a fault for that terrible misunderstanding. It should teach him a lesson about actually using words and talking, but she should have seen how he felt.

Felicity felt the tears falling down her face as the realization hit her.

“God, how could I be so dumb?” she uttered as she buried her face into her hands. . The fact that she hadn’t thought that the way Oliver treated her were clear signals of his intentions was proof enough that her feelings for him had turned her into a blind and insecure idiot. Even without Laurel in the picture, Felicity had never thought he’d genuinely want to be with her in a long-term relationship. That had been her first mistake, caused by her own insecurities. She wasn’t an insecure person per se; she knew she was considered attractive thanks to the males she’d encountered in her professional life that had misjudged her based on her looks and obviously she was very confident about her intellect and competency as IT expert.

The problem was Oliver.

The minute she thought about him in any other scenario that didn’t involve him being her boss or the city’s stubborn hero, she could only see herself as the socially awkward workaholic that never knew when to shut up. So yes, she’d been too blinded by her own fear of rejection to actually see all the signs that usually alerted her about what was happening in front of her eyes. She was a smart and observant woman; she wasn’t supposed to be this oblivious mess.

 _I can fix this_ , she decided. _I need to fix this._

She would talk to him in a few hours and they would straight things out. She refused to become another sad tale in Oliver’s life just because of a lack of communication. They’d been through worse things, after all. Their relationship would survive it without any problem. She had faith in them.

 

* * *

 

“I’m going to talk and you’re going to listen,” Felicity said as she burst into his office at Queen Consolidated first thing in the morning. He was so deeply immersed in his work that he visibly startled when she went inside.

“What’d I do this time?” he asked, looking at her with a forced smile. She narrowed her eyes. So, he was going to pretend the discussion hadn’t even happened and that everything was alright.

Like hell he would.

“Don’t do that, Oliver,” she warned him. He looked down for a brief moment before he met her eyes again. His face was impassive, a clear signal that he didn’t want her to see the inner turmoil he was feeling. “We need to talk.”

“Let’s pretend Friday didn’t happen,” he interrupted, brushing aside her comment about their need to have a conversation. Clearly, he wanted to avoid confrontation. “We can be anything you want us to be,” he gave her a tentative smile that looked more like a grimace. It was almost painful to see how he was trying to push his hurt feelings aside and accept whatever she wanted.

The irony behind Oliver thinking that she didn’t want anything serious with him and he would just take whatever she was offering wasn’t lost on her either.  

“Do you honestly think I…” she stopped herself, shaking her head. She didn’t need to argue with him, she needed to make him understand. “You know what? I have things to say and you’re going to listen, even if I’ve to tie you up in this chair,” she informed him, her patience wearing thin. She’d spent the whole weekend trying to contact him without success. Apparently he was very good at avoiding her if he put his mind to it. Unfortunately for him, Monday had arrived and now she was going to making him listen.

She walked to his side and turned his chair so he had to look directly at her.

“So talk,” he said, waving a hand.  

She gave him a dirty look, but it didn’t diminish her resolution. She’d fix this mess, even if it was the last thing she did in her life.

“It wasn’t my intention to hurt you,” she explained, locking her eyes with his. He opened his mouth, but she signalized him to keep quiet. His expression darkened, but he allowed her to continue. “I honestly thought you didn’t want something more and the thing between us was just two people who trusted each other being together and keeping things simple. I know I should’ve realized it wasn’t actually that simple because I am the only person aside Diggle that you trust with all the facets of your life. I let my personal issues cloud my vision and for that I’m sorry. I never wanted to hurt you, I swear,” she promised and his features softened a bit. One of his hands traveled to his face, pinching the space between his eyes.

“I’m sensing a ‘but’ here,” he guessed.

“It’s partly your fault that this misunderstanding happened,” she said, earning a shake of his head and a humorless smile from him. “You’re a big boy, Oliver. You should have talked. I know we are very close, but I’m not a mind reader. How could I even imagine you wanted a relationship with me if you didn’t say it out loud?”

“Because I thought you knew me better than anyone else!” he yelled, finally losing his composure. Felicity blinked twice, not surprised at all by his retort. It should scare her that the rehearsal talks with Oliver she had in her mind were so accurate when they happened in real life.

“I may be one of your best friends, Oliver. But sometimes I’m oblivious too. Especially when it comes to you,” she confessed quietly, remembering the weeks she’d spent on the edge of agony over the new facet of their relationship. She’d tried to remain realistic, tried not to create expectations regarding her relationship with Oliver. She didn’t want to fall for him when she was sure it’d lead to rejection. 

“How could you be so oblivious about what I really want from you?” She could hear the pain in his voice when he blurted out the question, but she couldn’t keep what she felt bottled up inside anymore.

“Because you never treated me like your girlfriend!” she fumed. “That’s why, Oliver! We never did anything else outside my apartment.” She saw the surprise on his face, so she kept going to make him understand her point of view. “In the span of two years, I saw you dating a few women and you never treated me like you used to treat your other girlfriends. How could I think you wanted something serious if nothing changed between us aside from the fact that we slept together?”

She saw him wince at the realization of his actions – or lack thereof. She knew all of her insecurities were written all over her face just like the hurt in her eyes he was probably seeing. The helpless look in his face almost broke her heart. He had no idea she had any doubts regarding them because he clearly had none. She didn’t know what that said about herself: if she was really so transparent about her feelings for Oliver that she didn’t leave any room for doubt or if she wasn’t as attuned to Oliver’s feelings as she believed she was when they first started sleeping together. She preferred to think the romantic aspect of their relationship messed up with her senses and perceptions. She still knew how to read Oliver.

For example, she knew he was drowning in guilt at the moment because he’d made her doubt them. She couldn’t lie to him and tell him it wasn’t his fault at all. It was his fault as much as hers.

 “We know each other so well, I really didn’t think traditional dating would be important,” he admitted, getting up from his chair to stand in front of her. “I know this isn’t an excuse, but,” he paused, taking her hands into his, their eyes never leaving each other. “I’m sorry if I made you think you were anything else less than important to me.”

“It’s not entirely your fault, Oliver,” she offered. “I could’ve confronted you about us, but I didn’t. I just let it happen,” she shrugged. “We had a serious case of miscommunication here, which is ironic considering how much I love to talk,” she joked as the corner of his mouth twitched.

She called it a victory.

Tipping her head, she gave him a gentle smile. “Don’t beat yourself up about it, okay? You’re allowed to make mistakes sometimes Oliver, and so am I. We made a mess and we clean it up, ok?”

He stared her for a long time before he nodded slowly. A charming smile formed on his lips before he spoke again: “You told me I should talk to you, so do you want to be my girlfriend?”

She frowned, feigning confusion. “I thought I already was your girlfriend.”

He chuckled before pulling her closer and sealing their lips together. When she pulled back, Felicity could see his eyes shining in joy, a rare moment in which Oliver radiated genuine happiness. Her heart constricted for the observation, but she refused to dwell on his tragic and heartbreaking past right then. She was supposed to be happy, not sad. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she kissed him again.

And they were blissfully happy for a moment in time. 

(In some ways they ended, but then they began again)


End file.
